Please join us in a show of unity. It is hopeful that we can create awareness with our plight and create a dialogue with the government about safer alternatives of cannabis as a medicine, and begin to create real change for our community. We must hope that the powers at be begin to understand the benefits of cannabis as a medicine and that we can all begin to breath freely in our plight to change the world. Please do come and stand with us in the face of justice and let us begin to create change. We are patients, Not criminals and we must demand that we begin to be treated as such. There is so much at stake not just for ourselves, but for the community. Please do what you can to take some time out of your life to be present for this date. it would mean so much to all of us in harms way. Stand with us in our quest for justice and let the world know we will not stand for this any longer. When: Feb 26, 2008 from 10:00 am to 11:00 am Where: Oakland Federal Building 1301 Clay St, Oakland, CA Contact Name: Michael Martin Contact Email: freetainted@yahoo.com Contact Phone: 888-Taint-Me Attendees: Michael Martin Jessica Sanders Diallo McClinn Mike Anderson (?)

As the wheels of justice turn one becomes frustrated with the uncertainty of your future. You become paralized with anxiety and find yourself lost in a world of confusing rhetoric. You eventually come to a fork in the road and it is important to make such decisions in a wise and well though manner. We are facing charges that could carry a penalty of 20 years with mandatory minimums in place and up to a million dollars each in fines. You are offered a deal that would eliminate a manditory minimum but still leave your fate in the hands of an unknown judge that may or may not be sympathetic to medical cannabis and that is really scary. the alternative is even scarier, as one ponder raising his two sons from a prison visiting room for 10 plus years. I begin to hyperventalate. My thoughts go numb. I am like a deer in the headlights. You attempt to carry on with life, but every waking minute is plagued with thoughts of the future and what the best choice for you and your family may be. My thoughts continue to flutter. yes. No. Yes. No. You want to be an idealist. You want to stand up for what you truly know to be right and it kills you to think of admitting guilt when you know you have done nothing wrong. You continue to think about your life and what you have seen and done. I do not regret a single moment of my time being involved with medical cannabis. I have never learned more. It is not often that you get to stand up for something you believe in strongly and make a difference in human rights and freedom. I have been blessed by my experiences over the years and this experience is no different. Although it is a difficult decision to make the future of my family is at stake and it sucks. You must find some compromise. There must be a way to "Die with Dignity", in this case DEAth is my giving up my rights and fredoms in an attempt to salvage my future. What is the right thing to do. Only time can tell. My mind is riddled with options and uncertainty. Life is what we make of it and it is pivotal moments like this in ones history that will forever become a fabric in the identity of who someone becomes for the rest of ones life. I am exhausted with what may be and continue to function in this cloud of fear, sadness, and anger over the entire situation The one thing I can be sure of is that I can wake up everyday and look at myself in the mirror and be proud of what I have been able to accomplish and what we have been able to do for the advancement of medical cannabis theraputics. The rest of it is out of my hands. I will either deal or not deal. That remains to be seen. It is beyond me at this point, but everyday gets a little easier and my sons get a little cuter, which is nice.

After hearing about State legislators in California added support for medical cannabis and the support of the many local and state officials that have already spoke up for the cause, I am beginning to see some light at the end of the tunnel. It is imperative that we begin to encourage ALL supportive government officials and influential members of society to speak up and let their support be heard loud and clear for all to hear. This ridiculous action by the DEA on medical cannabis patients and providers must be stopped. It is an outpouring of support that is needed to fuel the flames of justice, as we look to the House Judiciary Committee to put an end to the violent and unnecessary attacks on our community. Do reach out and call your local, state, and national representatives and ask them to stand up for the rights of patients in medical cannabis states. There are too many of us in harms way for what we believe in and know in our hearts to be truth. Cannabis is a viable medicine and we must begin to legitimize the effort further by convincing lawmakers to have cannabis rescheduled. To read more visit: http://www.americansforsafeaccess.org/downloads/SJR_20.pdf

It is a strange concept to think how the DEA raid of my home and business has changed my outlook on the world. Everything about my daily routine and life is changing at no request of my own. The way I look at life is different and the way I live my life is effected by the scarlet letter this unfair persecution has left me with. I wake up to the pitter patter of my kids feet. I am sleeping on the couch of course with a flashlight, as I am on edge of federal agents invading my privacy, and more-so my garbage cans. I awake slower and with less energy, as the everyday worries and anxiety of facing a federal indictment and spending time in jail seems to suck every last ounce of energy from my soul. I feed my son some cheerios, with no blueberries of course because those have gotten very expensive since the costs of this situation have began to take their toll on my finances. I check my email. in hopes by some miracle the justice system has changed the federal ban on medical cannabis and my immanent worries are suddenly over. It has yet to happen, but it could I keep telling myself. I drag myself to a shower after a cup of coffee, and grudgingly vow to carry on with my day and try to be productive. I am not allowed to use cannabis, as a condition of my bail, so I have resorted to more conventional over the counter painkillers, as I rotate between Aleve, Tylenol, and Motrin in hopes of tricking my liver into not collapsing. I would use my Marinol but it is twenty plus dollars a pill and I choose to use it only when in serious pain or overwhelmed by anxiety. I must remember to call the 'Code-A-Phone" 800 number line that tells me if my number has come up on the lucky "Will-I-Be-Piss-Tested-Today" lottery. I then try and focus on still making a living to support my family. I have a party rental company that needs tending to, but I always seem to get bound down trying to contact lawyers, talking to the folks at ASA, or going over possible scenarios for my future. I also attempt to look for additional work to help put some food on the table while the party rental business is slow. Craigslist, Monster, ABy Area Help Wanted. I try to focus, but often I am overcome by the magnitude of the road ahead. I often drive around putting out flyers for the business and resumes at businesses that interest me, but I am often so distracted that I am incapable of making the progress I hope for. I often either have to meet with a lawyer, counselor, pre-trial services agent, possible employer, IRS Counselors, Insurance Companies, and many other advisors throughout my journey. I try to stay positive, but I must admit that many days I get down and let the world get the better of me. It is somewhat refreshing that the holidays are over, as I can hope to move on professionally and look for a new start at a year that is hopefully less complicated. I return home to recharge with some time with the kids before dinner and I often am often dragged away by a phone call or need to get work done and I allow the pressures of the situation dictate my time and energy. It has become so imperative to get things done in these times that I am often obsessed and overwhelmed. I usually have so much on my plate that I cannot even imagine where to begin, so I sit there...head in the hands...hoping the ball of anxiety in my stomach will go away. It never does.I eat if I am lucky enough to not be in the middle of something, and try to help get the kids ready for bed, when I am not overwhelmed by the task at hand. If I am lucky the day has an event that I work or an odd job I can do for a friend. Not just because I am able to make a couple of bucks, but because it allows me divert my focus to something other than the case and my family's future. It allows me to breath. I try to escape with a television show or movie, but never make it. I either cannot sit still long enough or I am so tired I fall immediately asleep. Depends on the day. I get the strangest phone calls these days. If it is not the IRS, a lawyer, or an agent of some sort, it is a long lost friend that saw me on the news and picked up a flyer and decided to give me a call. Or it is another computer generated bill-collector asking why I cannot make my payment again. I swear I often think of throwing my phone in a lake and just letting the chips fall where they may, but it is just not realistic with everything happening. I try to sleep at night, but am constantly awakened by noises outside of my house or just plain nightmares of what my life could become. I wake up at one, three and five like clockwork now. walk outside and have a cigarette, check the perimeter, and go back in to watch CNN, just hoping I am not on it again. I hopefully doze off again, but often I just watch the sunrise on the east coast and wait for it to rise over my house so I can make some coffee and get on with whatever the next day has to offer.

The New Year is a time to reflect on the wonderful things of the year past and look forward with hope to the year future. Everyone can see the change and progress that we hope for and it is imperative that we continue to fight for what is right and moral. The year 2007 ended in a very difficult and trying manner, but it still was a good year. I saw the birth of my second son and finally got a chance to marry the love of my life. I had a great opportunity to advance the movement and was involved with many great projects throughout the year that raised awareness and brought about change. We hold our heads high for our resolution to make a difference in the perception of medical cannabis users everywhere and we look forward to the opportunity to be leaders of activism and a voice for injustice concerning patients and providers. The future is uncertain, as this unfounded and spiteful attack from the federal government on our community has come to a head. It is encouraging to hear that Rep. Conyers may take the DEA to task on their wasteful and aggressive attacks in medical cannabis states. It is hopeful to think that we may see real change in the electing of a new president that is hopefully more interested in ending wars than continuing down the same foolish path our nation has been on for too long. We hope that the pressure in Washington, the pressure here on the ground in California, and the pressure from activists and supporters nationwide will continue to bring about change in the way society views medical cannabis. It is hope that keeps us going and moving forward when the future looks ominous. It is the support of great people and the words of wise leaders that help us to navigate the course that is best for our families and our community. The end of the battle is near and as the DEA heightens its attacks on our communities we must stand up and say enough. We must all make a true and valiant effort to let our voices be heard. It is our duty to improve the lives of the world around and we deserve better. The DEA deserves better. Our nation deserves better. I call for an end to the lies and misconceptions that have shaped the viewpoint of cannabis. We need to remember that this community is strong in our numbers and it is our right to medicate in ways that we and our doctors see fit. The New Year is always filled with the hope of what could be, but it is important also to reflect on who we have been. Please join us in our quest to make a difference and help us to make 2008 a year of history and energy that carries us to freedom and liberty. I am proud to be surrounded by such a brave and dedicated group of individuals that have collectively stood up to tyranny and have made the case for change. You are all beautiful. Never stop believing in what a small group of concerned citizens can do to change the world.