Tomorrow life goes on.  I will humbly meet my fate in a Federal courtroom and hope for the best.  I understand that I am probably going to jail and as disappointing as that may be, it will be okay.  Life will go on.  I will find out where I stand and where I can begin to work to make life better for my family.

The waiting game will end in just over 24 hours and I can begin to end this journey and move on to better things.  I will be able to exchange one anxiety of not knowing for another anxiety of dealing with the consequences of my actions.  I can accept that.  I will have no choice.  Whatever that fate may be, it is not bigger than me and I am sure I will survive.  I understand myself better through all of this hazy situation and have a sense of calm as the big day approaches.

I realize this is not just about my imminent punishment, yet a product of a system of governance that sends mixed signals to the people of thirteen states that have medical cannabis laws.  This decision will affect patients and providers everywhere, as people still search for any form of clarity in this murky battle between states rights and federal dominance.  My future is at stake and I somehow understand that this has never been about me.  This has been about our products, our movement, and our efforts to create social change through understanding more clearly the reasoning behind medical cannabis prohibition.

Last week Judge Jeremy Fogel of Federal District Court in San Jose, CA stated that the interference in California's medical marijuana program may violate the Tenth Amendment.  Attorney General for California Jerry Brown issued guidelines protecting medical cannabis patients from law enforcement interference, okaying the cultivation of medical cannabis and collective dispensing procedures that send clear messages of support for the state's medical cannabis laws. The U.S. Attorney for the Northern District where we are being prosecuted states, "The people that the attorney general identifies as legitimate medical-marijuana operators are the people we view as flying below our radar." Congressman John Conyers who leads the Senate Judiciary Committee sent a letter earlier this year questioning the validity of the DEA's actions in my case and many others stating, "The Committee has already questioned the DEA about its efforts to undermine California state law on this subject."  All of these well-documented revelations about medical cannabis on the horizon and I will go plead for leniency in deciding the fate of my future tomorrow.  It is easy to see how the continuous sending of mixed signals creates confusion and leads to good people facing tough times and hard decisions. Tomorrow will be no different.  I will be faced with a path and I will have to accept it for what it is, a mistake and a miscommunication.

In any case, what will be will be and tomorrow will truly be "the first day of the rest of my life."  For that I am grateful.